We traveled to Toronto and to sick kids again in October, 2 weeks before halloween, we went to see the opthamologist to just observe Lucas' eyes again.
We waited a bit but in the end didn't have many difficulties, boys were a little restless. We wanted to go to the zoo but the day we wanted to go it was raining so we went shopping instead, I was able to get a couple of christmas gifts too, bonus!!! and we got to go to the bass pro shop, my dad's favorite destination!!
At the hospital, Lucas had to have eye drops this time so with him screaming and hollering we held him down to get the drops in his eyes, and then he was happy!!! Went to find Poppa, the man that Lucas was hollering for the entire time!! So that when the doctor would see him he was calm!! After all of that we are good with a year before we see them again, THANK GOD!! Now lets see if we can get to see both doctors again together next time!!!
Monday, November 5, 2012
Thursday, September 13, 2012
One Year Post-op
Wow I can't believe that the time has come to say that my little guy is one year post-op. I have been thinking about this for some time now and how much my parents had helped me to get the point of surgery, and then the tragic way we were together just 12 days later.
When I think about the actual day of his surgery, all the waiting and restlessness from me and my family, and when we finally saw the surgeon after he was done, he gave us a thumbs up, I think tears of joy were what were falling that day, on all of our cheeks. and then there was little Nicholas not knowing what was going on but keeping all of our moods higher then if he wasn't there!!
I can remember seeing my dad wiping tears from his eyes and thinking the only time I had ever seen him cry before that was when my grandmother (his mom) passes away!!
My mom's tears were a wonderful thing to see to, more so now because those were the last tears of joy I got to see from her eyes.
When we first saw my little Lucas in the ICU he had tubes and wires (these really didn't bother me I expected it, being a nurse myself) and to see his round head after it was so pointed before, I just wanted to pick him up and cuddle him, but I refrained. We went back after supper and I picked him up then and the little bugger promptly puked on me, again not totally surprising. The next time I picked him up was the next morning when he was in his room on the plastics ward. Actually he wouldn't let me put him down until early afternoon. Just in time for his post -op CT scan!!
seeing the swelling the next few days and watching him take everything in stride and watching him now, you wouldn't know he had ever gone through any of it.
I love seeing his smiling face every day, even when he is getting on my nerves!! But I need to end this now I smell a combo of poo and celery salt, so one had pooed and they both have gotten into my celery salt that I left on the table after seasoning supper, I hope the whole bottle isn't on the floor!!
I'll write again soon!!!!!
When I think about the actual day of his surgery, all the waiting and restlessness from me and my family, and when we finally saw the surgeon after he was done, he gave us a thumbs up, I think tears of joy were what were falling that day, on all of our cheeks. and then there was little Nicholas not knowing what was going on but keeping all of our moods higher then if he wasn't there!!
I can remember seeing my dad wiping tears from his eyes and thinking the only time I had ever seen him cry before that was when my grandmother (his mom) passes away!!
My mom's tears were a wonderful thing to see to, more so now because those were the last tears of joy I got to see from her eyes.
When we first saw my little Lucas in the ICU he had tubes and wires (these really didn't bother me I expected it, being a nurse myself) and to see his round head after it was so pointed before, I just wanted to pick him up and cuddle him, but I refrained. We went back after supper and I picked him up then and the little bugger promptly puked on me, again not totally surprising. The next time I picked him up was the next morning when he was in his room on the plastics ward. Actually he wouldn't let me put him down until early afternoon. Just in time for his post -op CT scan!!
seeing the swelling the next few days and watching him take everything in stride and watching him now, you wouldn't know he had ever gone through any of it.
I love seeing his smiling face every day, even when he is getting on my nerves!! But I need to end this now I smell a combo of poo and celery salt, so one had pooed and they both have gotten into my celery salt that I left on the table after seasoning supper, I hope the whole bottle isn't on the floor!!
I'll write again soon!!!!!
Friday, July 27, 2012
11 Months Post-op
So we are now just shy of being 11 months post-op and I can't believe it!!
This past year has been such a roller coaster. I'm just thinking that at this time last year we were prepairing for surgery, with all of his pre-op appointments and such. Also thinking of how much my Mom was there for me, Lord I miss her :'(.
but I love my Little Boys, and all of their little quirks!!!
This past year has been such a roller coaster. I'm just thinking that at this time last year we were prepairing for surgery, with all of his pre-op appointments and such. Also thinking of how much my Mom was there for me, Lord I miss her :'(.
but I love my Little Boys, and all of their little quirks!!!
Friday, May 18, 2012
Re-Living the Journey
Here I am at 230am reading all of my posts that I have written in this blog. From start to now.
Why I decide to read them all I'm not sure but I was crying along as I was re-reading all of my posts. I was picking out my grammatical errors and just leaving them to see if anyone else can find them!! And knowing how I felt at the time I wrote them and how I'm feeling now re-reading them. The odd one that I was crying with when I wrote it I didn't cry now, those feelings have subsided knowing that all of this is over and the irrational thought have gone. But then the others that I had cried over, I am finding that I am doing the same thing again, maybe not the the same extent but none-the-less crying again.
The one spot that I fund the hardest to read and that I cried the most, isn't when I blogged about my mom passing away it was the post when I spoke about Lucas' surgery and the way my dad cried. I'm tearing just thinking about it. But up until that time this was the 2nd time I had seen him cry, but now having lost my mother, and seeing him cry for days, now the tears come to me, I realize how having him shed those tears over my son is the same as when we knew my mom was going to die. It was the relief that he is ok and you can definitely say I'm happy that, that part of the day is over with.
I really hope that this has helped some people to realize they are not alone in their own journeys with their little ones and that even though the days are so hard that you have to cry from the time you get up in the morning to the time you go to bed, there is a light at the end of the tunnel and it will get better.
I also just found this quote that could work with a couple things in my life right now:
“Set backs are bumps in the road, they are not the end of the roads.”
― Bob Greene, Bob Greene's Total Body Makeover
Why I decide to read them all I'm not sure but I was crying along as I was re-reading all of my posts. I was picking out my grammatical errors and just leaving them to see if anyone else can find them!! And knowing how I felt at the time I wrote them and how I'm feeling now re-reading them. The odd one that I was crying with when I wrote it I didn't cry now, those feelings have subsided knowing that all of this is over and the irrational thought have gone. But then the others that I had cried over, I am finding that I am doing the same thing again, maybe not the the same extent but none-the-less crying again.
The one spot that I fund the hardest to read and that I cried the most, isn't when I blogged about my mom passing away it was the post when I spoke about Lucas' surgery and the way my dad cried. I'm tearing just thinking about it. But up until that time this was the 2nd time I had seen him cry, but now having lost my mother, and seeing him cry for days, now the tears come to me, I realize how having him shed those tears over my son is the same as when we knew my mom was going to die. It was the relief that he is ok and you can definitely say I'm happy that, that part of the day is over with.
I really hope that this has helped some people to realize they are not alone in their own journeys with their little ones and that even though the days are so hard that you have to cry from the time you get up in the morning to the time you go to bed, there is a light at the end of the tunnel and it will get better.
I also just found this quote that could work with a couple things in my life right now:
“Set backs are bumps in the road, they are not the end of the roads.”
― Bob Greene, Bob Greene's Total Body Makeover
Wednesday, May 9, 2012
Toronto and other appointments!!
Well, being May I should update again!!
So We were to Toronto again to have Lucas seen at Sick kids and we went for a opthamology appointment, and we also got to see Dr. Phillips.
My dad went with us to Toronto, and I'm not gonna lie, this trip wasn't that easy, well emotionally anyway!! The reason for that is because this was the first trip to Toronto that I had made since my Mom passed away and she was my rock, she was there every time We had to go down south!! EVERY TRIP!! So we found our selves a little blue.
But the trip it self wasn't that bad. We had to detour through North Bay due to a fatal accident on HWY 69, so that put us back about an hour, but when we heard about the accident we had just turned onto the highway outside of Sudbury so a 5 min turnaround was all that took. Nicholas seemed to get a little car sick but I think he had his brothers gastro that came from day care!! But we made it in one piece and it was surprisingly easy to find our way around this time. I don't know if it was because we kinda knew where we were going or if it was because Mom wasn't there, she was horrible with directions and would be looking around rather then looking for the road you needed!!!
We got ourselves settled in for the night then off to the hospital in the morning. We got to the opthamology department and didn't really have that long of a wait, surprisingly again. Then because Dr. Phillips was in surgery that day we went to talk to Alan to see if we could catch him in between cases. Well they were delayed, okay not a problem. They wanted some photos of Lucas' head so we went on for that and surprisingly again Lucas got a 100piece mega block set, because we travelled so far and Lucas sat so still for the pictures!!
After this was done we took to boys for a little play in the play park, hoping to wait out the doctor. But after a little bit of that it was starting rain and we were like do we go and see if my Aunt Kim was there yet or not. So we left. Just as the doors closed in the elevator to get to our room my phone rang, can you come to see the doctor. AAAAAHHHH, yes we are about 5 min away!!! So we basically sped walked back to the hospital, blowing past my aunt and got to see the doctor. The final outcome, 1 year visit!! YEAH!! Best news ever!! So we had the afternoon off and visited a bit with my aunt and walked to the CN tower where Chris and I went up, neither having done that before. Will definitely be bringing the boys when they get older, something to see!! While dad and aunt Kim went to a ball game at the sky dome (rogers center) The boys, Chris and I went back to the room, had supper and basically crashed, it was a long day!! Our way home wasn't eventful at all but We were sure tired!!
So not much has happened since then the boys have their needles tomorrow, and Today I got a letter saying Dr Phillips wanted to see Lucas at the end of the month In Sudbury. I emailed Alan and am just waiting to see what he says about that, but as far as the surgery is concerned you wouldn't even know that Lucas had one!!
I love my 19 month old toddlers!!!
So We were to Toronto again to have Lucas seen at Sick kids and we went for a opthamology appointment, and we also got to see Dr. Phillips.
My dad went with us to Toronto, and I'm not gonna lie, this trip wasn't that easy, well emotionally anyway!! The reason for that is because this was the first trip to Toronto that I had made since my Mom passed away and she was my rock, she was there every time We had to go down south!! EVERY TRIP!! So we found our selves a little blue.
But the trip it self wasn't that bad. We had to detour through North Bay due to a fatal accident on HWY 69, so that put us back about an hour, but when we heard about the accident we had just turned onto the highway outside of Sudbury so a 5 min turnaround was all that took. Nicholas seemed to get a little car sick but I think he had his brothers gastro that came from day care!! But we made it in one piece and it was surprisingly easy to find our way around this time. I don't know if it was because we kinda knew where we were going or if it was because Mom wasn't there, she was horrible with directions and would be looking around rather then looking for the road you needed!!!
We got ourselves settled in for the night then off to the hospital in the morning. We got to the opthamology department and didn't really have that long of a wait, surprisingly again. Then because Dr. Phillips was in surgery that day we went to talk to Alan to see if we could catch him in between cases. Well they were delayed, okay not a problem. They wanted some photos of Lucas' head so we went on for that and surprisingly again Lucas got a 100piece mega block set, because we travelled so far and Lucas sat so still for the pictures!!
After this was done we took to boys for a little play in the play park, hoping to wait out the doctor. But after a little bit of that it was starting rain and we were like do we go and see if my Aunt Kim was there yet or not. So we left. Just as the doors closed in the elevator to get to our room my phone rang, can you come to see the doctor. AAAAAHHHH, yes we are about 5 min away!!! So we basically sped walked back to the hospital, blowing past my aunt and got to see the doctor. The final outcome, 1 year visit!! YEAH!! Best news ever!! So we had the afternoon off and visited a bit with my aunt and walked to the CN tower where Chris and I went up, neither having done that before. Will definitely be bringing the boys when they get older, something to see!! While dad and aunt Kim went to a ball game at the sky dome (rogers center) The boys, Chris and I went back to the room, had supper and basically crashed, it was a long day!! Our way home wasn't eventful at all but We were sure tired!!
So not much has happened since then the boys have their needles tomorrow, and Today I got a letter saying Dr Phillips wanted to see Lucas at the end of the month In Sudbury. I emailed Alan and am just waiting to see what he says about that, but as far as the surgery is concerned you wouldn't even know that Lucas had one!!
I love my 19 month old toddlers!!!
Thursday, April 5, 2012
Toronto in a couple days, long weekend
Well time to say hello again. We are just about to journey down to the big city of Toronto again after the Easter long weekend.
I got an e-mail today saying that Dr. Phillips is in surgery the day that we are down to see the opthamologist, and he may try to see Lucas in between cases. But if not then we would have to see him via video conference again, not a huge deal.
So tonight I'm gonna be trying to pack but that will most likely be done tomorrow morning, as we will be going to visit at my sister-in-laws over Easter. Then on Sunday to Manitoulin Island to see my family. Monday we will then travel to Toronto with my Dad for Lucas' appointment on Tuesday. This is going to be difficult as I haven't gone to Toronto for Lucas with out my mom, so this is the first time I'm going with out her, but My dad has been there right along with us.
Dear lord keep us safe!!
I got an e-mail today saying that Dr. Phillips is in surgery the day that we are down to see the opthamologist, and he may try to see Lucas in between cases. But if not then we would have to see him via video conference again, not a huge deal.
So tonight I'm gonna be trying to pack but that will most likely be done tomorrow morning, as we will be going to visit at my sister-in-laws over Easter. Then on Sunday to Manitoulin Island to see my family. Monday we will then travel to Toronto with my Dad for Lucas' appointment on Tuesday. This is going to be difficult as I haven't gone to Toronto for Lucas with out my mom, so this is the first time I'm going with out her, but My dad has been there right along with us.
Dear lord keep us safe!!
Saturday, March 24, 2012
6 months post-op
Well we are 6 month post-op now and Lucas couldn't be doing better!!
He is walking all over the place, running most of the time, and aside from one spot you can't even notice his scar!! We are going for a follow up eye appointment on the 10th of April and that is coming up very quickly!! I'm not nervous about this I just want to make sure that there is nothing wrong with my child's eyes and that he gets a good report regarding that.
This little guy did give me a little scare a couple of weeks ago as he climbed a couple of stairs at my sisters place and then fell, once I picked him up he had a bump on his fore head between his eyes. That really made me nervous, but the bump was gone just about as quickly as it came, so I'm guessing what ever was done with his head is now secure even though I will still worry about that. I guess that will be a question I will have to ask the next time we see the surgeon!!
Well I hope that everyone is well and I will blog again when I have time!
He is walking all over the place, running most of the time, and aside from one spot you can't even notice his scar!! We are going for a follow up eye appointment on the 10th of April and that is coming up very quickly!! I'm not nervous about this I just want to make sure that there is nothing wrong with my child's eyes and that he gets a good report regarding that.
This little guy did give me a little scare a couple of weeks ago as he climbed a couple of stairs at my sisters place and then fell, once I picked him up he had a bump on his fore head between his eyes. That really made me nervous, but the bump was gone just about as quickly as it came, so I'm guessing what ever was done with his head is now secure even though I will still worry about that. I guess that will be a question I will have to ask the next time we see the surgeon!!
Well I hope that everyone is well and I will blog again when I have time!
Sunday, January 22, 2012
4 months post-op
Wow 4 months have already gone by!! It's crazy to think it all changed that long ago!! Well just at the 4 month mark, I was cuddling with Lucas one day and noticed that the spot on his incision scar that took the longest to heal, had kinda skinned off. This started to worry me as is something going on or did he just bump his head on something?? This very active 15 month old little boy, was all over the place that day and I couldn't even think of where or when he may have bumped his head!!
Well I thought about it for a while and finally after everyone but me was in bed, I decided I would e-mail his surgeon with my concerns and then take a picture in the morning.
I got a response the very next morning, saying send the pictures when able and that there shouldn't be anything with the incision line and his surgery at this point, like I was thinking. So after like 20 attempts I got 2 pictures that I was able to send along, and Alan looked at them and again just told me what I had thought all along.
So here I am thinking, why did you just do that, you knew that from being a nurse, but again like I have told myself several times in the last little while, I'm a mother first, and am allowed to be irrational at times, and let my imagination free!!
Well now another few days later and I look at this new spot and can see that it is healing very well, and keep thinking to myself that this should have been the way I was thinking all along!! But Lucas is fine no infection and it is definitely not stopping him, especially when he knocks over a box so he can climb onto it and then get up on my coffee table!! He is such a smart little mischievous boy!!! So when that little scab falls off I will be so happy.
In April we will again see opthamology as Lucas had a little bit of a lazy eye prior to surgery, but well baby check this week showed that, they didn't see any signs of that so I'm really happy about that!!
So until next time!!
Well I thought about it for a while and finally after everyone but me was in bed, I decided I would e-mail his surgeon with my concerns and then take a picture in the morning.
I got a response the very next morning, saying send the pictures when able and that there shouldn't be anything with the incision line and his surgery at this point, like I was thinking. So after like 20 attempts I got 2 pictures that I was able to send along, and Alan looked at them and again just told me what I had thought all along.
So here I am thinking, why did you just do that, you knew that from being a nurse, but again like I have told myself several times in the last little while, I'm a mother first, and am allowed to be irrational at times, and let my imagination free!!
Well now another few days later and I look at this new spot and can see that it is healing very well, and keep thinking to myself that this should have been the way I was thinking all along!! But Lucas is fine no infection and it is definitely not stopping him, especially when he knocks over a box so he can climb onto it and then get up on my coffee table!! He is such a smart little mischievous boy!!! So when that little scab falls off I will be so happy.
In April we will again see opthamology as Lucas had a little bit of a lazy eye prior to surgery, but well baby check this week showed that, they didn't see any signs of that so I'm really happy about that!!
So until next time!!
Thursday, January 12, 2012
Deer season, Christmas, New Years, and more!
Again I'm running behind in my posting!! Babies holidays and work are all running together now and I'm not sure if I'm up or down some days!
But this past November, I returend to Manitoulin Island (HOME) for white tail deer season. My family and friends were amazed at how well his had healed from his surgery, being only about 6 weeks post-op at that time. His hair had started to really grow and started to cover the suture line so you couldn't see it. They did wonderfully, and Lucas was standing at that time, but wouldn't take a step.
The next week, however, when we got home he started to walk! He was standing next to my chair and let go and took about 3 steps towards the centre of the room. After that it was about a week befor he built up enough courage to walk out of the living room and venture to his bedroom on his feet.
Soon after that we put up our christmas tree and with the 2 of them, it was deffinately work to keep them away from it!! The presents were a different story! As we placed the wrapped presents under the tree thier curiosity flourished and the picking at the corners of the paper began!! By Christmas morning when we pulled the gifts out from under the tree, the corners and edges of the boxes had little tears and pick marks on them!! Lucas didn't seem as interested in pulling the paper off of his presents as Nicholas was, because as soon as he could see what it was he was trying to play with it! Because I was working Night shift we opened our presents as soon as I got home from work and Chris and the boys went to his dads for the afternoon. I then joined them about 330pm for supper and some more presents.
We did Christmas with my sister and her family and my dad on New Years day, and spent New Years eve at a fund raising dance for the town of Mindemoya, for new play ground equipment and such. It was fun to be had by all! As I have said to a bunch on Facebook, I'm glad 2011 is over and am looking forward to a great 2012, we had too much heart ach and a year of I don't knows with Lucas' diagnosis of Metopic Craniosynostosis. Then his surgery and my mom's death with-in a week of each other!! Not to count the death of some good family friends!!
So to one and all, Happy New Year and all the best in 2012!!
But this past November, I returend to Manitoulin Island (HOME) for white tail deer season. My family and friends were amazed at how well his had healed from his surgery, being only about 6 weeks post-op at that time. His hair had started to really grow and started to cover the suture line so you couldn't see it. They did wonderfully, and Lucas was standing at that time, but wouldn't take a step.
The next week, however, when we got home he started to walk! He was standing next to my chair and let go and took about 3 steps towards the centre of the room. After that it was about a week befor he built up enough courage to walk out of the living room and venture to his bedroom on his feet.
Soon after that we put up our christmas tree and with the 2 of them, it was deffinately work to keep them away from it!! The presents were a different story! As we placed the wrapped presents under the tree thier curiosity flourished and the picking at the corners of the paper began!! By Christmas morning when we pulled the gifts out from under the tree, the corners and edges of the boxes had little tears and pick marks on them!! Lucas didn't seem as interested in pulling the paper off of his presents as Nicholas was, because as soon as he could see what it was he was trying to play with it! Because I was working Night shift we opened our presents as soon as I got home from work and Chris and the boys went to his dads for the afternoon. I then joined them about 330pm for supper and some more presents.
We did Christmas with my sister and her family and my dad on New Years day, and spent New Years eve at a fund raising dance for the town of Mindemoya, for new play ground equipment and such. It was fun to be had by all! As I have said to a bunch on Facebook, I'm glad 2011 is over and am looking forward to a great 2012, we had too much heart ach and a year of I don't knows with Lucas' diagnosis of Metopic Craniosynostosis. Then his surgery and my mom's death with-in a week of each other!! Not to count the death of some good family friends!!
So to one and all, Happy New Year and all the best in 2012!!
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